I notice people speak to themselves in a mean way. I certainly am guilty of the same thing when I think I have done something wrong.
The gremlin that lives in us waits to take us down with language not befitting who we are.
You know how it sounds, “How stupid could you be to do that. You should have known better. That was a thoughtless thing you did. You never get it right.” And on the self talk goes taking you down a path of self flagellation.
Let’s look at self compassion and how it might change the way you speak to yourself.
Self compassion is treating yourself with gentleness, love and understanding, much the same as you would toa child or a sick friend.
When faced with a challenging situation the first thing to do is stop. Stop doing whatever you are doing and sit down (unless you are driving).
When you stop, take a few breaths and feel yourself settling into wherever you are.
Then start to speak to yourself in a much kinder way. Use statements such as:
May I be kind to myself in this moment
May I give myself compassion in this difficult situation
Take a moment to notice how your body feels. Notice if it is more quiet than when you started.
Before you go off into more activity just wrap your arms around you and squeeze yourself with love.
I guarantee you will quiet the voice of the gremlin and you will feel better.
Essential-Self = Authentic Self
As we gather to speak authentically, honestly and non-judgmentally with each other we feel better, accomplish more with less stress and save time because our community helps us.
The Essential-Self webinar coming soon. A one hour session with Howard Parsons.
Pre-registration is open now. Register here